No online dating profile for the world to see.26 Years’ Experience working with gay single professionals.All couples have to do is show up." We treat you as a person, not a website profile.

That left me with few options other than the depraved world of internet dating, right?

I’d previously ruled it out as too sad or desperate.

And don’t get me started on meeting a potential husband in a bar.

Bars in Chicago are populated by three types: (i) snotty, preppy North Shore guys that I would rather pick a fight with than attempt to flirt; (ii) guys from the Western suburbs who all work at the Board of Trade and are not interested in committed relationships; and (iii) college kids.

Reservations are always made under the first name of both parties, and I’m only expected to share my contact information if I want to see the guy again.

Oh, and I can go on as many or few dates per week as I desire.

Because that’s the only way to tell if there’s chemistry. Our IJL certified matchmakers create a dating experience personalized just for you. It’s Just Lunch offers clients a chance to get acquainted over lunch.

What happens: Once staff members find a good match, they'll tell you about your date, coordinate your schedules, and select a nice spot for lunch or drinks. A dating service is trying to revolutionize the blind date.

I forbid myself from on grounds that the stalker-ish ex-wife of a partner I work for (who is convinced that a mythical affair involving yours truly ended her marriage) uses the site, and I could only imagine the online smear campaign if she saw my profile.

And e Harmony is out of the question—not just because of the five million-part questionnaire, but because it seems too conservative. Phil, whom I despise.) Finally, there’s JDate, and—what else can I say—my college boyfriend upended my need to convert to Judaism when he dumped me after graduation.

"It plans everything, down to when and where you meet.