Let me paint a common story for you: It’s been a while since you’ve started trying to get better at dating and it seems like you’re no further along than you have been before. The more posts you read, the more approaches you make… The things that hold us back in dating almost always systematically bleed into the other parts of our lives as well and it’s only when we can be honest with ourselves, confront and address these issues that we can manage to move forward and start making the progress we As I’ve mentioned before: negativity is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Nerd Love, even in myself in different aspects of my daily life.

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After all, it’s likely that “being yourself” hasn’t exactly gotten you to where you want to be. When we look at people who have something we want – whether it be material success, a skill or talent or even just a hot girlfriend – it’s only natural to try to be more like them.

Whatever they’ve got going for them worked for them… And after all, whatever you’ve been doing hasn’t exactly been working out for you so far.

The problem of course is that while Mystery was able to get away with dressing like a Hot Topic jumped him in a dark alley, he’s a professional magician; dressing weird comes with the territory.

Everybody else was hoping that their outfits were going to do most of the heavy lifting for them and generally looked like idiots.

but that doesn’t stop them from trying to force themselves into the model because they Trying to fit into a personality type that’s so diametrically opposed from our real self is like trying to force yourself into shoes that don’t fit; you’re uncomfortable at best and the potential benefits are vastly outweighed by downsides.

When you’re trying to build the life you’ve always dreamed of, you need to do so in a way that’s harmonious with who you , not for who you think you’re should be.

Nowhere was this more apparent than in the early days of the Pick Up community, when people assumed that one of the secrets of success with meeting women is to “peacock”; that is, dress up in exotic or even outlandish ways in order to get attention.

Suddenly, you couldn’t swing a dead cat in a bar without hitting someone trying to rock a fuzzy top-hat and black nail polish or a shiny silk jacket, spiky earrings and New Rock boots.

There’s nothing less appealing to a potential partner than feeling as though that they’re nothing more than a warm hole or body that’s filling a slot marked “girlfriend”.