Maybe you can't remember the last date you went on and are convinced chivalry is dead.Wherever you are in this confusing dating climate, I want to let you in on the ending of the book before we even get started. In fact, chivalry isn't dead; you just need to put down that phone and set some standards for your dating life—fully embracing the new rules to find love. " "We wrote letters for two years, and he phoned me and said he'd met another gal." My grandmother shared with me one chilly Sunday afternoon the story of her first love breaking her heart.

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I didn't know if anyone would listen, but as it turned out, there were many women who could relate.

My in-box became overloaded with e-mails and comments about heartbreak and confusion and terrible, horrible, no good, very bad relationships.

I didn't have high expectations for dating at twenty-three, but a last-minute text containing the word burrito wasn't exactly what I had in mind.

If you're breathing and female, you've been there—waiting for a call, a text, an e-mail, even a tweet—some sign he's still alive.

I'd respond to texts, Facebook messages, and late-night calls, but it never ended well. We always want to be the exception and make excuses for men, don't we? I told Daniel I couldn't be there on such short notice, but to call me because "I'd love to see you again." Over the next month or two, he texted me he missed me, he texted me to invite me to a party, he texted the weekly "How are you?

I wasted years sitting by a phone, a computer, waiting for men to show me I was worth loving. Armed with my share of heartbreak, I knew I wanted to try dating differently ... If I told him I was busy or if I asked him to call, would I miss my chance to date him? " message, but I stood strong in asking him to call. A New approach to Dating I had zero guarantees that my love story would turn out well.

I envisioned myself sixty and single overhearing friends at parties chuckling with their husbands about how I dated all wrong.

But despite how hard it was to walk away from potential relationships that felt good now, I set standards for my dating life—because I didn't want several "fun" relationships or a great time on spring break.

It took many single years of imagining myself as a cat lady with my mom remaining my emergency contact, but eventually Michael came into my life and never stopped calling.

"Miss You, Baby" Safely on the other side of marriage, I started blogging about my not-so-glamorous dating mistakes coupled with small lessons and victories I'd learned along the way.

" and they graciously—albeit annoyed that my relational drama was keeping them from hearing about the nuns' problem-solving skills—listened to me debate how to respond.